And the man bit the dog

By Francis Ewherido

One of the features of news, we were taught in school, is oddity. In illustrating it, the commonest example then was: when a dog bites a man, it is no news, because it happens every day. But when a man bites a dog, it is news, because it is rare and unusual. It is no longer news that many older men marry much younger women. The difference in age can range from an innocuous 15 years to an outrageous 60 years.

Yet, it is still no news. But when news filtered in that the man who could become the next president of France, Emmanuel Macron, is 39 years and his wife, Brigitte Trogneux, is 64 years, the social media went into frenzy. A particular slant of the story was sent to me over 20 times on WhatsApp and other social media platforms. It was a classical case of a man biting a dog, even by the liberal and “civilized” Western standards.

According to the story Macron started having a crush on his former teacher, Trogneux, when he was 15 years and clearly a minor. By the time he was 17 years, he vowed to marry Trogneux. That vow came to pass when he married Trogneux at the age of 29 in 2007. Trogneux was 54 years then and had divorced her former husband. But the relationship goes way back. Exactly when, Troneux says,

“Nobody will ever know at what moment our story became a love story. That belongs to us. That is our secret.” But do not rule out the possibility that it started while Macron was still a minor or when Trogneux was still married to the father of her three children. When it comes to matters of the heart, anything is possible; emotions take the central stage, while rationality recedes.

The relationship did ruffle feathers at the initial stages. Both families were ill at ease and it took time for them to accept the inevitable reality. Lover boy Macron did something gentlemanly though before going ahead with the marriage; he sought and got the consent of Trogneux’s three grown up children. Parts of the larger society were, however, not so welcoming; they made snide remarks and gave them hostile looks in public.

Predictably, a section of Nigerian women are happy. They say it is not only men who know how to enjoy younger blood, the women also do. As if it is new. We know that many young men in their 20s “service” much older women, some of them old enough to be their grandmothers. It is just that they have not had the courage, like Macron and Trogneax, to formalize the liaison; while some are into it strictly for the sex (the mamas) and others strictly for the money, connections and probably the free sex ( the young men). We have also seen some young Nigerians marry much older white women, but that is for US or European citizenship, unlike Macron’s which oozes love all the way.

Funny enough, some of the women applauding Macron and Trogneux vowed not to allow their sons go into this kind of marriage. In a culture where procreation takes precedence over companionship in marriage, it is not surprising. But it also shows the hypocrisy and selfishness of humankind. As long as it is somebody else’s head being used to break coconut, it is okay. These women should just pray that Macron’s kind of love bug does not bite their sons. If it does, they would have to accept reality like Macron’s parents or die of high blood pressure. I hope not, though.

Since the news broke out, younger generations of Nigerians have also latched on to it for different reasons. They are complaining that their contemporary in France is about to become president, while some of them are still staying with their parents. I advise such youths to stop the lamentations and learn some valuable lessons from Macron’s love story.

Macron, at 15, had a crush on his teacher and followed it up with a vow at 17 years to marry her and it came to pass 12 years later. Macron is focused, single-minded, tenacious and knows what he wants. Macron is also a patient bird. Many of today’s youths lack these essential ingredients for success.

The only other little matter that troubled me was Trogneux’ husband; what does it feel like to have one small boy steal your wife’s heart first and subsequently take possession of her? It must be a very humiliating and traumatizing experience. But then, we have had worse cases here; young men, who stole their fathers’ younger wives and concubines. Sometimes, these matters of the heart look like some prides of lions’ meal time: No rules, no regulations, no orderliness.

 

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