Why is he showing a lot of interest in my daughter?

DearBunmi,

I am a divorced mother of two daughters in their early twenties and have a man I’ve been involved with for years. At first he didn’t see eye to eye with my first

daughter and they argued a lot. In fact it was so bad that my daughter went back to live with her father. But as soon as she got into the university, she started spending more time with us and got on like a house on fire with my partner. He now does everything for her and even takes her to the campus whenever she wishes.

Now he’s talking about buying her a car and even taking her on holidays with us. I never thought the day would come when I would be jealous of my own daughter but their new found likeness for each other is giving me a lot of stress. Even my ex admits it’s unhealthy. What do I do to bring back sanity into my family?

Kemi, by e-mail.

 

Dear Kemi,

You obviously have talked this over with your partner but now’s the time to have a word with your daughter. If your partner were to have the same affection for your other daughter, things might look healthier. Men go through the mid-life crisis too and your man might be looking for a way to regain his lost youth. You have to be careful the way you go about things so you won’t turn both of them against you.

Encourage your daughter to bring home her male friends and tell her if she needs taking anywhere, you either do it or she takes commercial transport. An affair under one’s nose is very common and very dangerous.

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